Shit's About to Get Real

I'm all for animal rights -- believe me -- but what I don't understand is how people can care so much about the welfare of their own cat or dog (or porcupine/llama/squirrel or whatever -- holy crap, any of those as a pet would be stupendous!) and get so riled up about someone who leaves their pet in the car for 20 minutes while they pop into the pharmacy for emergency condoms.  They probably had a really valid reason for leaving their pet unattended for that period of time -- and when since do pets need your constant supervision?  They're not babies, you guys.

I understand your concern -- really, I do -- but what baffles me is that 98% of these people who get so defensive about such 'cruelty' towards pets are the exact same people who will sit down to a massive steak or veal parmigiana.  (There's a 99.9% chance that I made up that previous statistic, but just trust me on this.  I am a wizard, after all. lolol)

Like...do you even listen to yourself talk?  Do you realize that the words leaving your mouth when you protest the mistreatment of animals is blatant hypocrisy when you turn around and do even worse to the animal that died in order to be your dinner?  I'm not trying to be a picket sign-holding, douchebag vegetarian or anything by criticizing you for eating meat.  Rather, I'm pointing the finger at you as you wear two conflicting masks: one of an animal welfare activist, and one of a passive aggressive carnivore.

It's like being a hardcore Slayer fan -- you know the type: always wears at least one piece of Slayer merch at all times -- but when Rebecca Black comes on the radio, you ditch every single piece of your collected Slayer merchandise and dance like there's no tomorrow to the abortion that is 'Friday'.

Smarten up, you guys.  No one likes Slayer fans who enjoy 'Friday'.  Wait, I can ammend that to 'No one likes 'Friday'.'  There we go!

It made me lol.