May Contain Nuts

Do you know what's annoying?  The rise in 'nut allergy awareness'.  I mean, I get that people with such allergies often are suuuuper sensitive to their allergens, but come on!

I can guarantee* that about 98.9% of the time, a product's disclaimer with regards to nuts is just plain ridiculously superfluous.


The other day, I went to the pantry for some trail mix -- you know, the mixed bag which, without fail, contains  peanuts and other high-energy foods?  Ok, so on the back of this bag of trail mix was a huge disclaimer that not only said that the bag's contents included nuts, but ALSO that it was produced in a facility that deals with nuts.

Wait....what?

Pause.  I'd like to quote Kanye West here and say, 'Dog, are you fuckin' kiddin'?'


You must be kidding: nuts in a nut product from a nut factory that may come into contact with nuts?!  Sacre bleu, that is mind blowing information!  Why don't we put needless advisories on products whose contents are blindingly obvious?  On bottled water, bottles will read 'Caution: may contain hydrogen and oxygen'; and on the shirts of prostitutes will be a glitzy applique cautioning against STD's.

Or better yet, let's just use our common sense to deduce what the contents of a particular product are.  Durr.


*No, I can't guarantee it, but still....